#6: Oh, How Job Interviews Have Changed

Plus, a podcast about conversion therapy and former theater kids are getting the respect they deserve.

Laid Off Life is a place of respite for the weary workforce. Whether you’re unemployed, on strike or just trying to make it through the workday, let this be your 5-minute mental break from the grind of late-stage capitalism. 

In this weekly newsletter, you’ll find musings and insights about work and life, things I’m finding useful (or useless) in my job search, gems from my DMs, and recs about worthy ways to waste time - from articles to TV shows and podcasts and beyond.

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Oh, How Job Interviews Have Changed

My interview for my last job, which was a high-level job, consisted of an HR person and a recruiter asking me a few softball questions like where I got my dress. In the second round, three colleagues, none of whom would be my boss asked me several, totally answerable questions about my skills and work philosophies in a panel format. (The person who would be my boss never even met me before I was hired!) I didn’t have to prepare anything. I just showed up and answered the questions the best I knew how. I provided some work samples following the meeting. An offer was extended the following week.

Actually, pretty much all my past interviews went this way regardless of what stage I was at in my career. I landed about 80% of the jobs I interviewed for and all this time I’ve allowed myself to believe this was because I had proficient skills and was good at interviewing. Bwhahahahahah!

I’m here to report that the interviewing game has changed! With several industries in decline and an unstable economic climate, hiring decision-makers have become drunk with power. Companies are like that hot person who keeps dating around endlessly because they can have anyone they want.

Interviews are no longer sessions to feel each other’s vibes and ask where you got that cute dress. Going into a conversation with a recruiter or hiring manager with nothing but a reasonable understanding of your industry, a skill set, and a set of professional experiences to draw from is DEAD.

In today’s market, the interview process takes weeks, sometimes months. You can be asked to do up to 9 rounds of interviews. In order to have the pleasure of jumping through these many hoops like a well-trained circus pony, you must be able to STAR. I’m not talking about bringing your main character energy. STAR is an interview technique acronym that stands for SITUATION, TASK, ACTION, and RESULT.

Essentially, this means, you have to prepare 1-3 minute anecdotes from your career with success metrics attached. Adding another layer, these anecdotes must specifically relate back to the job description and the company. This means you need to spend several days researching the company, its mission, its values, its organizational structure, as well as the person(s) who you’ll be meeting with. You know that it’s important to know who you might be committing 40+ hours a week of your life to. But also, it’s a huge investment to make before even speaking with a human being who works at that company.

If you have done all of this prep and are able to successfully STAR under pressure with impressive results, prepare to do it all over again with a new person(s)! If you get to round 3 or 4, you’ll probably be asked to do a presentation of some sort. If the hiring team likes your presentation, then you’ll probably have another meeting or two where multiple people ask you more questions that you’ll provide STAR answers to — but you can’t use the same ones you already used! Finally, if the gods and goddesses are smiling upon you and the oracle predicts that you are the chosen one out of five hundred hopefuls, you may get an offer.

REALLY??

YES.

For those of you going through this process, you know how absolutely exhausting it is. You might feel a pit in your stomach when you get an interview instead of the excitement you’d expect to be feeling. You might feel rage —or at least irritation— at having your precious time wasted. You might snap when some well-meaning friend asks you how you’ve been enjoying all your free time while unemployed. You don’t have any free time. You’re either slaving over a cover letter or preparing for an interview. It’s truly Sisyphean. But it’s the price of entry if you want someone else to pay for your health insurance. (More about that soon!)

I’m curious if any of you have cracked the code for successful interviewing without pulling all-nighters. I’d love to hear your tips and tricks.

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Worthy Time Wasters

Here are my weekly recs to combat doom scrolling.

LISTEN: Ariana Madix: There’s Just Something About Her on Scheananigans with Scheana Shay

Last Vanderpump Rules rec, I promise. Obviously, Ariana Madix had to respond after Rachel/Raquel’s 3-parter on Just B With Bethenny Frankel. And obviously, I had to listen. Consider yourself fluffed for VPR Season 11.

LISTEN: Dear Alana,

In this podcast, host Simon Kent Fung explores the life of Alana Chen, a 24-year-old woman who disappeared from Boulder, Colorado in 2019. At 14, she confessed a dark secret to her priest — she was sexually attracted to women. Over the next seven years Alana received conversion therapy without her parents’ knowledge or consent.

Simon, who also underwent conversion therapy on his quest to become a Catholic priest, is drawn to learn more about what happened to Alana (and subsequently, what happened to him). Searching for answers, Simon connects with Alana’s mother and she allows him to look through the dozens journals Alana left behind chronicling her faith and dream of becoming a nun. The story is told, in part, through Alana’s journal entries, which makes it all the more compelling…and heartbreaking.

WATCH: You Are So Not Invited To My Bat Mitzvah (Netflix)

This film, starring Adam Sandler, his daughters, and his wife was truly delightful and also a good reminder that all things considered, it’s much better to be an unemployed 40-something than a 13-year-old girl. Based on a YA book with the same name, the story is about Stacy and Lydia, BFFs who've always dreamed about having epic bat mitzvahs. Things start to unravel when a boy comes between them. Don’t they always?

READ: None Of This Is True by Lisa Jewell

I’ve read all of the British thriller writer Lisa Jewell’s books. They are dark and twisted and so much stranger than fiction that they seem like real stories. Her latest is about the crossing of paths of two women, a well-known podcaster Alix Summer and an unassuming stranger Josie Fair. The women discover that they have the same birthday while celebrating their 45th at a local restaurant.

Josie convinces Alix to do a podcast about her and things unravel from there. What starts out as a casual interview ends up becoming a gruesome true crime podcast and accompanying Netflix special, Hi! I’m Your Birthday Twin!

BONUS: The publishers made an actual Hi! I’m Your Birthday Twin! podcast based on the interviews in the book.

READ: Grown Up Theater Kids Run The World (New York Times)

What do politicians, Olympians, tech entrepreneurs, a Supreme Court justice and an adjunct professor who also runs a business selling backpacks to carry cats all have in common? They were theater kids in their youth. The ability to perform an outsize version of oneself — a trait that once made theater kids an easy punchline — has become a strength in our increasingly self-promotional culture, whether on social media, in a Zoom meeting, or in a presidential debate. Does this mean my college degree will finally be respected?!

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